Blogging With Julie in 2019






Welcome to Blogging With Julie in 2019

I tried to access some of my old blog posts in order to copy and paste the links here so that all my blogs would be in some kind of order but I can’t.  They are so stuffed full that I cannot even access them.  So, oh well.  I’ll just start this one brand spanking new and you can just go on a treasure hunt in locating some of my old blog posts, if you like.  They are here on the website.  It’ll require some work on your part if you are interested.  Or, we can just start 2019 all shiny and new and go from there.

Either way, I am so happy that you are here to join me.  I’ll try and make it interesting.  🙂

I do hope that 2019 will be a great year for all of us!

Happy 2019!


Gordon and I at our daughter Veronica’s wedding this past January 2019.


Julie’s New Camera

(I upgraded to a new Nikon.  My old one was literally falling apart.  So very happy to have this new one.  As someone who takes photos every single day, I am so lost without a good camera.  Good News:  I discovered that my old lenses fit my new camera!)  🙂


Out the Door……

I have always had a thing for “bags.”  I tend to carry a large purse that I can never close, snap, zip, etc.  So, it tends to stay open.  I look at women’s purses when I am out and about and how they just leave them wide open with their contents exposed.  I think that is careless.  In many cases I can even see their wallet.  My solution to that is to place a scarf at the top.  That way, no one can see the contents of my purse unless they physically move the scarf. 

(I also always take food and drink with me whenever I leave the house.  Above you can see some Sea Salt Almonds and my Water.  Sometime’s I may take my favorite Peanut Butter Sandwich and some BBQ Chips.  Or anything with Peanut Butter spread on it.  I eat Peanut Butter every single day.  Always have.)

Black and White Photos that Veronica took, and Developed Herself

I do tend to have a thing for Pink and Grey. 

They were my wedding colors, and I have grey eyes.




June 12, 2019


(Even where my website is concerned.)  🙂


Mad Hatter:  “When is soon?”

Me:  “I have no idea.  Just soon.”


But very “soon”, I will have a new revamped website.  New format. 

The team that I hired to help me to get rid of my cyber-stalker problem, and to shore up things with my website, are giving me a new website.  As they told me, “We’ll give you a beautiful website now.”  (I thought I already HAD a beautiful website.)  Silly me! 

I understand what they mean.  Have it more streamlined, lots of sub categories under categories.  Not as much jumping out at you when you visit my website homepage.  Let’s just neaten it up and make it is less………………………….(wait for it)…………………………….CLUTTERED!  (A knife through my heart!)


In 2009 when my nieces from Ireland came to visit us and saw our home for the first time, they walked in and were in awe.  Kate just kept looking around and asking me, “Where did you get all this stuff?”  My brother Johnny told her that ‘Julie collects things.’  All I could think of to tell her is that, ‘I am a materialistic American, and we shop (our economy is consumer based), and I collect because I have many interests in life.  I don’t just like ONE thing.  I like ONE MILLION things!  And it is reflected in our home when you look around.  We have collections.

Which I was told as why my niece Lola wanted to “collect” Lalaloopsie dolls.  🙂



(I Am A Clutter Person)

I walked into the home of the realtor that sold us our house many years ago and I was immediately depressed.  Everything was generic.  The traditional flower display on the dining room table, and by the front entrance.  The “traditional” furniture.  The generic photos of family members all wearing white button down shirts and jeans.  The house was just too “clean.”  It was too “staged.”  It totally lacked the personalities of the home owner’s.  (If they even had personalities.)  I hated her beautiful home!!  I was so happy to get back to my cluttered home.  Ahhhhhhh…..much better……to be surrounded by all my STUFF!!!!  🙂


I do admit that my home is cluttered.  I realize that sometimes my “piles” get in the way.  (My “piles” are projects I am working on, or future projects that I will be working on.)  I also realize that this is a lot to dust.  Trust me, I know.  As I do the dusting!

But, I don’t like packing my life away in boxes to be stored in the attic.  I don’t want my memories packed away and stored up there.  I want them down here with me so that I can look at them everyday, and remember them.  I want them to surround me.  I want to think of them.  They aren’t just my memories, they are my inspiration for life, and creativity.

This entire website is based on my memories.  You take away my CLUTTER, then you take away my MEMORIES, AND my inspiration.

I’m sure the new website will look very nice.  I’m sure it will be all streamlined and beautiful for the average person.  (Ugh!  I hate the word, average.)  I’m sure it will appeal to the “average” visitor that will spend a good 30 seconds looking at my website.  But I never created this website for them.  I did it for me!  And the handful of people that are like me.

Thank you for all the years of interest you have given me.  I hope both you and I will like my new website.  🙂

Thank you for taking the time to look at my cluttered website.  I do appreciate you and your uniqueness.

Your friend always,



June 8, 2019

My Dark Mood

My mother and step-father used to tell me that I live in a fantasy world when I was growing up.  I have always heard them say that about me.  And they were right.  I did.  When they would say it though, they were cruel and heartless.  They would mock me, make fun of me, laugh at me.  Just as my mother and step-father always were to me, cruel and heartless.  I was the new kid in school so many times, in so many different cities, towns, states….  I was bullied horribly at school, and abused horribly at home.  So, I retreated into a “Fantasy World” in order to survive it all.  I think that’s what the brain does.  And that is probably the definition of mental illness. 

But, once you do survive it then you need to come back.  It’s hard to do it on your own but I did.

I’ve heard my mother say so many times, as she shrugs her shoulders, “Mental Illness runs in our family.”

As if it’s just in the blood and there is no fault of her own.  Did you know that 85% of mentally ill are born perfectly normal?  It’s our environment that shapes us and turns us mentally ill.

My brother Frank is a Paranoid Schizophrenic.  He developed this when he was 16.  They say that it is viral.  If that’s the case then anyone can “catch” it.  It is curable if you are diagnosed as an adult.  But, it stays with you for life if you develop it as a child. It does taper off in your 40’s and you do get better.  But you will never be cured.

My brother Frank was born adorable.  The best looking baby, toddler, kid, teenager……  He was always so good looking.  He was smart, intelligent, funny, athletic.  There are baseball games that are legendary with Frank being the star and winning the games for his team.  But the plays weren’t simple, they were complicated and phenomenal!  How he won for his team was genius!

Frank and I were the athletes of the family.   Johnny and Ben have no coordination whatsoever.  But we were all in marching band.  That did require quite a bit of talent.  I was Color guard (flag and rifle), Ben played triples.  He was part of the drum line.  He was extremely good!  Frank played Saxophone, and Johnny played Trombone.

I know that when Frank would came to Hawaii to visit us and we would go to luau’s that all the hula girls would swarm around him.  I used to say, “Here comes Frank with all the coconut bra’s following him.”  🙂 



My brother Frank, who was born with so much potential, who is a 48 year old male, 10 years younger than me, lives in a trailer here in Florida with his wife Brenda, and her parents.  Brenda is Bi-Polar/Paranoid Schizophrenic.  She is originally from The Philippines.  Her parents, Jesse and Sonia put Brenda (who’s real name is Jessica) into a Catholic orphanage at age 5.  Then they flew to America, with the baby, Christine.  After 11 years they went back and got Brenda out of the orphanage and brought her to America to live.  When I first met Brenda she was stunningly beautiful.  My parents were so mean to her.  But that was normal in our household, as they were always cruel to me.

Sadly, Brenda never recovered from being placed in that orphanage for 11 years.  And who knows what all they did to her while she was there?  After all, the Catholic Church does have a reputation, if you know what I mean?  Also, they tend to treat children that they view as “unwanted” as if they are fair game to whatever they want to do to them.

So, whatever horrors that Brenda went through, she never recovered.  I don’t blame her.  I wouldn’t want to come back to reality either.

Frank and Brenda did have a son, Joseph, my nephew.  Joseph has now been diagnosed as being Bi-Polar.  When I saw him last his medication had him so slow and motionless.  It was as if I was talking to a drugged out junkie.  My mother had him put on that medication.  Of course, that was after she dumped him in a shelter and left him there.  Which is why I uninvited them to Veronica and Brian’s wedding. I would like to add that my parents, John and Mary Lancaster, raised Joseph from the age of 2 until now.  Of course< my step-father died in 2013, thank goodness.

Joseph is mentally ill.  Frank is mentally ill.  All of us are probably mentally ill to some degree as well..  But, I do blame my mother and step-father.  After all, we were raised by a psychopath and a narcissist.  How healthy an environment is that?  I blame my mother and step-father for creating all this mental illness that my mother chalks up to DNA.  Not only did they create it all, but they fanned the flames of it so that it would thrive!  And it has.  You could even say that our upbringing was abuse.  Being the new kid in school 9 times in 12 years?  Moving from town to town, state to state….that is abuse in itself.

I live in a cruel country where the mentally ill are treated so horribly.  No one would ever dream of standing around the bed of someone that had cancer, laughing and pointing at them.  But yet, that is what we do to people who’s minds are sick.  They can’t help it.  Just as you can’t help catching that cold, or flu.


Funny, but none of what I have been writing about has anything to do with my “Dark Mood.” 

Everything I write about above is history.  Nothing new.  Same old, same old.  Sadly.  Such a waste of great intelligence, family members of mine.  They all have high IQ’s, special abilities, but yet the mental illness get’s in the way of whatever talents that they have.

But lately my cyber-salker Paul Gray has been extremely active with his stalking of me.  After all, stalking is abuse and harassment on it’s own.  As I told my brother Johnny, ” I’m down to 1 bully!  And one is enough!”

It does get to you.  Of course it does.  You know that saying, “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger?”  Well, I don’t believe it.  I think life’s villain’s chip away at you , and chip away at you, and chip away at you, until you’ve just had it.  Paul has chipped away at me for so many decades that I have had it.  But, I am a survivor.  For some reason I just keep on surviving.  Even when I don’t want to.  Funny, huh?

You know that question that we get asked at times?  Are you a fight, or flight kind of person?  Weirdly enough, I am a fighter!  I will stand there and fight whether it is with words, manipulation, humor, hiding, inner strength, outer strength….  I stupidly stand there and fight!  It’s just in me to do so.  But, it is giving me a darker mood that I have to deal with lately.  What with Gordon working overseas I don’t have my partner here with me to help me laugh off the situation.  Granted, we do talk on the phone every day, but sometimes I need him here to rub the stress out of my neck and shoulders.  I especially need that great foot rub!  🙂

We are finally spending money to fight Paul and it is worth it!  We also finally have some extra money to fight Paul!

I just found out today that he has mirrored email accounts of mine!  I knew that he could access my email, but I didn’t know how sophisticated of an account that he has on us.  You know how they say “It’s always darkest before the dawn?”  That is where I am now.  I am in a dark place, but I see a light that I am moving toward.  I will always follow that light.  Sometimes it may be far off.  But I keep heading towards it.  I guess that is the “fantasy world” that I live in.  It’s called HOPE.



June, 6, 2019

My Very Strange Week

(Me with Brodie, Christmas Eve

I’m 5’8 just to give you a scale of how tall Brodie is.)  🙂

December 25, 2018- December 31, 2018

I think it’s time I wrote about this.

At this writing Gordon has been working overseas now for the past 10 months and I have been here in Florida alone.  Brodie does live here, but he and his girlfriend MacKenzie do live between her apartment with her twin sister in Tampa, and our house.  Mackenzie is still in school and commutes to St. Augustine for classes, so the two of them stay in different places during the week, not just here with me all the time.


I had a wonderful Christmas Eve, and Christmas Day.  Having spent the time with my children and their partners.

Brodie and Mackenzie, and Veronica and Brian

And Gordon on What’s APP  🙂

  We had good food, good laughs, nice gifts, everyone was happy, especially me.  But during my alone times, which I don’t mind one bit, I put into the Bluray Player Season 2 of Sherlock.  You know, the BBC show that stars Benedict Cumberbatch and Martin Freeman?  I love it!  I don’t normally love modern day version’s of Sherlock Holmes but I do LOVE this one!   Probably because Benedict Cumberbatch is phenomenal as Holmes.  And I do love the chemistry between Martin Freeman and himself.  

Benedict Cumberbatch, and Martin Freeman in Sherlock

I also love how they do the storyline.  It’s interesting!  The writing is great!

Anyway, It was during this particular week that I must have watched this show, Season 2, the Irene Adler episodes, every single day repeatedly from Christmas Eve until New Year’s Eve.  Except, I don’t actually “watch” it.  I just put it on to play on the Bluray player repeatedly, and I listen to it in the background.  Kind of like a fireplace.  It’s just background noise that I am very familiar with and that I enjoy.  I know the characters, the scene, the dialog, the wardrobe, etc.  I don’t have to actually watch it, to watch it.  If you know what I mean?  Well, there is a scene that is particularly crucial, but I need to build up to that. 

First:  Here is the introduction of Irene Adler:

The actress, Lara Pulver is excellent as Irene Adler.

Here she is wearing her “body armor” to meet Sherlock Holmes and she certainly did throw him for a loop!

But this scene is crucial to my week:  (I’ll tell you why in a moment.)


It’s this scene where Watson sets off the smoke alarm so that the cops show up at Irene’s house.  That alarm goes off in the video above. 

Bear in mind that I must have “watched” this episode a good 30 times that week.


It was Christmas night and I had fallen asleep in the Lazy Boy chair.  (Which is the most comfortable chair in the world!  I sleep in it quite often, actually.)  I was awakened with a big start after midnight by this pounding on my front door!

I was scared!  I was home alone, it’s after midnight, and someone is pounding on my front door!  And Monk wasn’t exactly attack dog material.)

I looked through the peep hole but saw no one.  I looked outside to see a car, but I saw none!  I then called through the door, “Who is there?”  A man answered saying he was a policeman.  I then opened my door but kept my locks in place so that I could just peep out without opening the door.  There was a policeman there.  I asked him what he wanted?  He then told me that my “alarm” had gone off and he was here to see if I was alright.  I knew immediately that my “alarm” did not go off and I told him so.  I told him that he must have the wrong house.  That everything is fine here.  I just assumed that it must be a mistake.  He went on his way, and I went back to “chair.”

The very next day, in the afternoon, I’m still “watching” my Irene Adler episode when another cop came to the door.  I opened the door and asked what he wanted?  He told me that my home alarm was going off and he was checking on me.  I told him that my alarm is not going off!  I then told him of the cop that visited me the previous night to check on me, and telling me that my alarm was going off even when it wasn’t. 

By this time I’m starting to wonder what is going on?  Then, later on that night I get a pounding on my door from yet another police officer!  This time, a woman.  And, she was checking on me because my “alarm” was going off.  By now I know that there is something going on that just isn’t right.  I then asked the cop what security company that was sending her to my house?  She told me, Matrix, (not the real security company name.)  I told her that I don’t even employ Matrix. 

It was then that I resumed the playback on my Bluray of my Irene Adler episode where the “alarm” keeps going off that I suddenly realized that, THAT episode is tied to the cops coming to my house!!!!


He can hear that I am watching these Irene Adler episode’s!!  But how?



It was a few days later that another cop came to my house telling me that my alarm was going off.  I then decided to call that Matrix company and find out what was going on?  They wouldn’t help me as they said, “You don’t have an account with us so therefore we can’t help you.”  I told them that “I KNOW I DON’T HAVE AN ACCOUNT WITH YOU!!  QUIT SENDING THE COPS TO MY HOUSE!!!”

It was then that the “bills” started arriving in my mail!  You know, because these cops are having to be dispatched to my residence, for NO REASON!?

Trying to talk to cops is a huge waste of time as they are only drones.  Sorry to be so blunt, but it is true.  They only follow orders, they are not here to reason with me, or think for themselves, or connect dots, they are only here as drones to do the job they were sent to do.

I must have had 7 visit’s from cops that entire week.  Each one arriving to make sure I was o.k. because my “alarm” kept going off.

Each cop did admit that it was registering as a “audible alarm.”  I asked them when they arrived… “Do you hear an alarm going off?”  They would then admit, “No.”  Then I would follow up with, “Then how can it be an audible alarm?” 


I knew that this was Paul, my cyber-stalker, doing this.  I know that he see’s himself as Sherlock, and me as Irene Adler.  He does see us as some sort of soul-mates that will just never get together.  He also loves to let me know that he can listen in to my house.  Just last week when I had disabled an app that he used to listen in to my house, I get a phone call from someone leaving a message that said, “I can still hear you.”  Who does that?  Who calls you up, leaves a message on your machine that says, “I can still hear you?”


So, how did I get all of this straightened out?  I finally found a decent police dispatch woman that held a 3-way phone call with me and the “Matrix” company.  And told them to call off the cops, and to quit sending me notices in the mail of money I owed them, that I didn’t actually owe them.  If you know what I mean?


So, Paul, you think it’s o.k. to send cops out to my house to do your bidding?  You can just hack into their computers and send them on your very own wild goose chases?  What a waste of tax payer money!

You are NO Sherlock and I am not YOUR Irene Adler!!!

And, as an Empath I also know you see yourself as Keylo Ren and me as Rey.  I know you have your Martial Arts training.  But, I am NOT YOUR REY!!!


Get a life Paul, before you get Life,


Come on Paul, I’m 58 and you are 56.  Let’s put an end to this right now.  We’re too old for this!  Enjoy the life you have.  You are missing out on so much because of your obsession with me.  I am such a boring person!!!!  I’m also really fat and ugly, I just use lots of make-up and suck my stomach in for photos.  But trust me, I am not worth one minute or your time!  You know, there are some gorgeous younger women out there……  Come on, I’ll bet some of them would love your stalking abilities.  So……. move on…..  you can do it!  I know you can!  🙂


June 5, 2019

A Rant, by Julie

I went for my quarterly check up to my family practitioner a few weeks ago.  Instead of seeing my usual nurse practitioner, Lisa, whom I adore, they had me see this doctor that I didn’t even know worked there.  I asked him if he was new?  He then informed me that he had been there for the past year and a half.  (Oops!)  🙂  Let’s call him Dr. Horcrux, not his real name.  I waited, and waited, and waited a good 40 minutes in the exam room before he finally made his appearance.  I had gone from pacing around the room, to laying down on the exam table, to laying face down on the exam table, to playing with the eye/ear/ and nose attachment on the wall, to cleaning out my purse, to making my shopping lists…….

He FINALLY came into the room and then told me that every now and then they like to rotate the patience’s so that is why I was seeing him instead of Lisa.  Overall I am a very healthy person.  The nurse practitioner is enough for me as I don’t have serious health problems.  I go there for maintenance, blood work, labs, test results, prescription refills, etc.

I had a bad feeling about him from the start but I pushed that aside in order to confide in him of the horrible stalking that I had been going through these past few months.  I wanted it down in my medical file as our mental and emotional health is important.  And I wanted it noted that I do have a stalker and he does play a role in my health.

They also have us fill out a form every 6 months asking about our emotional health.  There are several questions asking us how we feel on a scale of 1-10.  I think they want to determine if we are so unhappy that we may go on some shooting spree. 

Because of the answers that I had checked off on that form I felt compelled to explain exactly why?  I want it noted in my medical records the role that having a stalker does play on my health because Paul Gray does play a role in my mental and emotional health.  It is also good to have this on paper as it will play a role when we do eventually go to trial.  You need to record these things.

So, as I was explaining to this man all that I go through I did mention that I just wish that God would strike him with a lightening bolt and put me out of my misery.  The doctor then asked if I was a Christian?  Oh, shit! I thought.  Now I have to answer that question.  I didn’t want to lie to him, but I also didn’t want to tell him the truth, but I did anyway.  I told him that I was an atheist. 

BOY!  Did the mood in the room suddenly change!

NOTE: ( When I say, “Oh My God!”  It doesn’t mean that I am talking to God.  When I say, “Bless you.” when someone sneezes, it doesn’t mean that I expect God to bless them.  So, when I say, “I hope God strikes you down with a lightening bolt.”  I don’t think that will really happen.)

He then started to tell me of his Christian faith and how God does punish those whom he feels deserves it.  I got the impression that he was telling me that I have a stalker because God is punishing me.  Riiiiiight……

Paul is a right-wing wacko, and the “doctor” I am seeing is also a right-wing wacko.  So, what to do?  Keep calm Julie until you can get out of there!  I have found it is best to play along with these kinds of people.  So, I did.  I even made the follow up appointment for 2 weeks from that date about something he saw in my ear.  (Wax, apparently.)  I got out of there and the following day I called the office and cancelled my appointment with this doctor AND made an appointment for 4 months from now with Lisa.  AND I insisted that I had better only see Lisa!

I had also told that doctor that I do not want anything sent to my email or cell phone as my stalker has access to all of that.  The best way to reach me is with my home phone.  Just leave a message.


That frickin’ doctor did that on purpose!  Just when I told him that I wanted NOTHING sent to my email, here comes a survey.  So, guess what I did?  I filled out the survey!!!  🙂

I spoke of my encounter with “Dr. Christian” and how uncomfortable he made me, and that I do not want to see him anymore in the future.  He has no business preaching to me during my appointment.  I also relayed that I am not filing a complaint.  I do not want him to get into any trouble.  But, I was asked about my visit and I told them about it.

Two hours ago I received a phone call from Dr. Horcrux, asking me about the survey I filled out!  WOW!!!  Talk about confidential!  I did not speak with him.  I told him that I do not have anything to say to him and I hung up on him!!

I don’t know where this is going?  I am hoping that my hanging up on him is the end of it.  But I really don’t know?  What is wrong with American men that they feel they have the right to run over women?  I think it’s religion.  Religion gives them (in their minds) permission to do to us whatever they want to.  Adam’s Rib?  Is that what we are? 

One thing about these people that I know very well, is that they will do one of two things to you.  They will either shun you, or go after you!  Personally, I prefer the shunning!

I may just have to find a new medical clinic to go and receive my healthcare.   I hope not.  As I will miss Lisa! 



June 4, 2019

Click Here for:  Diana, Kate, Meghan, and Me

I just finished it and I am very pleased with it.  If you would like to take a look.


As taken from………

Meghan and Harry Departing on their Honeymoon

My Aquamarine Ring Gordon Gave Me Recently

When Diana wore this ring years ago I loved it because it was a beautiful clear blue.  Then Meghan was gifted the ring on her wedding day to Harry and she wore it while wearing that gorgeous white dress getting into the blue sports car to drive off with Harry into the sunset.  🙂

The thing is that I never told Gordon that I wanted one.  I just kept thinking about it.  Then all of a sudden the ring arrives in the mail from Gordon.  (On being an Empath…..)  🙂


My Ring

What you see here are some Royalty stamps.  I am a Philatelist!  And I have been since my teenage years.  My Grandfather being the Post Master that he was instilled this collecting in my mother, and in me as well.  This is just a few examples of my Royalty Collection.

When I was a teenager my mother would take me and my step-brother Scott, and my little brother’s, Johnny and Frank, (Ben wasn’t born yet.) —-To the Stamp store every Saturday and we would look through what we wanted to buy to add to our collections.  Scott and I were the most into it.


Charles and Diana

I brought out all my old Diana Newspaper and Magazine Clippings.

I started this collection from the moment I first heard of her.

On looking at all of my clippings I can’t help but wonder… Am I a Fan?  Or a Stalker?

Royal Visit to Florida, 1985

Palm Beach Country Club

Gordon and I were married in June of 1985 and we moved to Port St. Lucie, Florida.  It was while we were living in Port St. Lucie that Charles and Diana made a trip down to Palm Beach for a Polo Match.  I wanted to go so badly.  I believe the day was a Tuesday.  I had called in sick in the hopes of being able to drive the 3 hours distance, I believe?  In order to catch a glimpse of her.  I didn’t make it, but I did save the newspaper clippings.  Interestingly enough there are some great recipes on the back of the article of foods that were served to Charles and Diana.  I am thinking about recreating them sometime.

My Diana Beta Collection

(Tea and Scones)

I paid big money for these BETA tapes back in the 80’s.  I also still have my own BETA Player.  Which last I tried it, it still works!  And Sadly, mine and Gordon’s wedding video is also on BETA.

The Video Veronica Bought for Me

Diana and Meghan on DVD

I haven’t watched them yet but I am looking forward to it.


May 30, 2019

What’s Up?

I’ve been a busy girl today buying up some domain names.  3 to be exact. 

Stay Tuned!!!

For those of you that know of my situation of being a victim of my husband’s former best friend.  He has cyber-stalked me for decades.  He has been particularly active since Gordon has been working overseas over the past 10 months..  I guess he figures with Gordon gone that I am fair game?  I have written about Paul several times in my website.

I have often thought why me?  Why am I so attractive to Paul? 

I am a 58 year old woman.  If someone had told me in my thirties that I would have a stalker in my late 50’s I would respond, ‘Wow!  I must be looking pretty good in the future for that to happen!’

Paul is 56, and will be 57 in September of this year.  He was Gordon’s childhood friend.  I think Gordon met him when he was 11.  I have often thought what is it about me that makes Paul think that he has some sort of connection to me?  Is it because I have grey eyes and his last name is Gray?  Could it be because the colors of mine and Gordon’s wedding were pink and grey and Paul’s last name is Gray?  And he was a Groomsman in our Wedding?  Could it be because our son Brodie’s middle name is Keith and Paul’s middle name is Keith?  With Keith being my Scottish ancestry name?  And probably his as well?  Is it because my mother almost named me Carolyn and his mother’s name was Carolyn and his sister’s middle name is Carolyn as well?

Does he somehow view all these coincidences as some sort of divine sign?

I do know that Gordon once told me that Paul used to sing the old Rick Springfield song:  Jesse’s Girl.


Except Paul would sing, “I wish that I had Gordon’s Girl.”

Sometime’s I wish that I had never met my husband, Gordon.  Because then I would never have met and known Paul and had his stalking.  But then I get sad that I would never have known the man that has loved me the most through thick and thin, pretty and ugly, good and bad, fat and skinny, rich and poor, etc.

Catch 22!

Do you know that Paul listens in through my microphone on my computer?  No matter how many times I disable it?  Do you know that he can reinstall apps that I uninstall on my computer, and then prevent me from uninstalling them because he uses them to spy on me?  Do you know that he can view and access every picture and document on my computers as well?  Do you know that he listens in through our Samsung t.v. and can hear every conversation that we have?  Do you know that he is in our cell phones and can hear all that we do, even in the bedroom? 

That is how I live!

Is that “Romantic” to you?


I just Glam it up for the Website

Starting a New Backyard Project

If you were to ask Brodie’s girlfriend, Mackenzie what I look like in real life she would say….. ‘She has no make-up on, her hair just hangs there with no style to it, and she wears these big bulky glasses.  But, she always has lipstick on.’

Is that beautiful to you?

Today was the first day that my yard workers saw me all glammed up, and a pin could have dropped!  They almost didn’t recognize me.  I thought it was funny.  I wasn’t wearing the vintage swimsuit that I’m pictured in above.  But, I did have the hair and make-up done.  In all the past few years they’ve been doing our yard they never saw me all made up until today.  Because to them I was just Julie Whann who handed them their check every month with no make up on and my hair just hanging there so unattractively.  But yet always has lipstick on.   🙂

(I secretly love it when people see I am more than they think I am.)


I also bought the domain:



Interestingly enough, I paid under $20.00 buck for the and the resale value immediately was just under $500.00.  Wow!  Sounds like the stock market.

I will NEVER sell it as I AM THE!

I actually am probably the very first cyber-stalking victim.

And yes, I do call myself a “victim” because that is what I always have been where Paul’s stalking is concerned. 


I was watching on Twitter this little African-American girl proudly talking about how she doesn’t need rescuing by anyone (man) because she can rescue herself.  Well, as someone that has had to rescue myself for the past 58 years I’m getting a bit tired of HAVING to.

The universe has been far kinder to me than humanity ever has been.  I can’t tell you how many times a human will do something mean or rude to me and then the universe will then pick me up, dust me off, cradle me, and clear a path for me to go forward.  Sometimes LITERALLY!

So, to those of you that are religious and see this as God helping me instead of the “universe”, then God sure must love this atheist.  🙂


I have recently hired a team of computer experts to help me with my Paul problem, and the damage that he does to my website, and the new website’s I’ve just obtained.  (I’m sure he’ll do his best to get at those as well.)  They are from another country.  I contacted an agency in the UK and told them of all my problems and they recommended this particular team to me.  I can already see a difference in how they help me and the “so-called” help that I receive from American’s in the same area of expertise.  The team isn’t just fixing problems for me, they are advising me of things that I can do to protect myself.  They are doing things that I don’t believe many American’s would do because they just don’t care to connect dots and thoroughly help me.  American’s just want to get paid.  There is no honor anymore among the people of our country.  But this team is connecting dots, tracing steps, monitoring, not just fixing.

They are also making big changes for me that will help to ensure my website’s security and safety that I don’t want to talk about here at this time so as not to give anything away to Paul.

Sure, I am paying them a lot of money.  But I feel I’m getting my money’s worth for the first time in decades where computer issues are concerned.  Because I am finally getting help.  Because this damsel needs rescuing!  


My parents used to tell me that “If you don’t play the game, the game ends.”  Well, in my many experiences in life that statement is not true.  I may not play the game but yet the attacks never cease from those that do.  Whether it be Paul, or past mean-girls, or nasty neighbors, or horrible bosses.  They never stop.  I have discovered that my only option is to just get away from them——when I can.  Sometimes, I can’t.  Like where Paul is concerned.

I am a strong believer in DUMPING PEOPLE!

It’s funny but I always have dumped people.  I WOULD LIKE TO STATE THAT I HAVE NEVER DUMPED ANYONE THAT CARED ABOUT ME.  ONLY THOSE THAT DIDN’T, OR NO LONGER DID.  Even when Psychiatrists were advising their patients years ago to try and ‘work things out.’  I was dumping!  And interestingly enough now Psychiatrist’s and Psychologist’s are advising their patients to DUMP PEOPLE.  🙂 

Which is why I think that we need to do what WE think is correct and not rely on the advice of so-called “professional’s.”  I mean, if they are just going to change their advice over time then how much do they really know to begin with?

Perhaps my being an Empath is why I knew ‘working things out’ is just not going to work.  I needed to get away!

I certainly don’t have all the answers but I know that I am due some peace and privacy, and Paul is due a prison sentence. 



May 16, 2019

Click Here for:  Diana, Kate, Meghan, and ME!


My writings for the current post I am working on……  An Excerpt:

I was in college at the time attending The American, Business and Fashion Institute in Charlotte, North Carolina.  The college was owned by the Hummel people.  You know, those little Hummel figurines?  Our dormitory was at Queen’s College.  I remember waking up at 5:00 a.m. on a school day to watch the wedding of Charles and Diana on my roommate Bunny’s t.v.  I think she had a black and white t.v., meaning that I couldn’t watch the wedding in color.  But I didn’t care.  I was happy to see what I did. 

My college roommate Bunny left, and me and a boyfriend Sheik, right, outside our dormitory.  Sheik and his family were from Saudi Arabia.  The most impressive thing to me was when I went to his house and his parents bar would suddenly emerge from out of the wall.  I was impressed!  Sheik was very smart.  We once went to a movie and watched it for the first time.  Then as we were leaving the theater we encounter Bunny and a date wanting to watch the movie so we decided to watch it again with them.  Sheik had memorized the entire movie and could recite it word for word after only watching it one time before.  I was impressed!  But, me being the southern woman’s libber that I was, and he being the Saudi person that he was, it didn’t last past a few months. 

NOTE:  It just occurred to me last night after I wrote this that I remember Sheik was a Saudi prince.  I was told this at the time I was dating him by some people that knew his family.  It also just occurred to me that that was my chance to be a Princess.  🙂  HELLO????

Sometimes I think my mind just doesn’t work like everyone else’s.  I literally just did connect the dots that I was dating a prince and that I perhaps, could have been a princess?  But let’s face it.  This union would never have lasted very long as I am just too liberal to marry someone so….how shall I say…..Saudi?  But none the less…..I dated a Prince!!!!  🙂 


Hey, how many people can say that?  🙂


May 2019

Aladdin Song


Everyone knows that I am proud Disney Girl!  I came across this video sung by Zayn and Zhavia and I was blown away!  I have been a Zhavia fan from the moment I heard her sing.  However, Zayn is about a 100 on a scale of 1-10 here.  Whereas Zhavia is now about a 6 on a scale of 1-10.  I’m not saying that to be mean.  It’s just that he is sooo good!  Everyone else is diminished by his voice.  I am so blown away!  This Disney girl can’t wait for what is coming!  🙂


May 11, 2019

UPDATE on my Cyber-Stalker Paul Gray

This is in regards to what I have written below this.

Last night after I published He Has a Lock on Me!, I knew Paul would retaliate, and he did.  He logged into my website at 3:02 a.m. from Secaucus, United States from IP address:  It’s not his IP address, it’s just one of many that he hijacks and uses specifically for this purpose.  Granted, it does not show up in the Log in’s my website saves, it shows up as a bot that goes unregistered as a visitor.  However, being the Empath that I am, and knowing him so very well, I knew he would try something so I kept all my equipment on as to monitor it.  At 3:00 a.m. I woke up and came to check on my website and 2 minutes later saw him log in.  (I can read you in my fucking sleep Paul.  You are that transparent.)  That immediately logged me out!  However, I then went where I know to go (can’t say here publicly) and I was able to change the password and knock him out of my site.  Oh, he can get back in very easily, such is my saga with him, but what he doesn’t know is all that we know about him.  This is just more evidence against him.  Today he knocked me out of my web hosting company website, you see, he had white listed some IP address of his that he has been using for years to get into that account, here is the one he’s been using….


What I would like to say to Paul right now is that you will always be better than me where computer’s are concerned.  You’ve been doing this since the mid 80’s.  I see you as being very smart and talented and even creative in some of your stalking and sabotage of me and my website, but it is just such a waste of a great talent.  I don’t feel sorry for you, I see you as too evil to give you that.  But, every time you do something to my website or my computers or any account that I have, (he used to sabotage my Ebay transactions when I listed the condo for rent.  Which is why I haven’t started my Julie’s Diamond in the Junq Shoppe.) 

Everything you do to me is being watched, recorded, and filed away.  I may not be able to beat your skills on a computer, but I do have the ability to hire people that can.  So how did I hire these people without your knowing it?  There is such a thing called the PHONE BOOK.  I live in a neighborhood loaded with old people that still have phone books.  They also have LAND LINE PHONES that they don’t mind me using sometimes.   Those are phones that you can’t hack into and listen to private conversations.  There is also such a thing as MONEY ORDERS that can be purchased from the United States Post Office and mailed through the USPS without your being able to know about any of it.  

I can feel the anger and fear building up inside you right now.  The ringing in my head is loud and the volume keeps getting louder.  Just remember, the stronger your feelings the better I can read you.

Enjoy freedom while you can Paul,



May 10, 2019

He Has a Lock on ME!

I took this photo of me today because I wanted to post a recent picture but I don’t think the smile I have on my face reflects what I am about to write about.  So, why am I smiling?  Because even though I do go through quite a bit of crap from my cyber-stalker, Paul Gray, I try and be a positive person in my daily life.  Sometimes it can be more work than other times but at the end of the day I like myself and I know that I am not doing anything wrong, he is.

For those of you that have read my blog posts for years then you are aware of him and a little of what he has done to me over the past few decades.  Just because I don’t write and update every day doesn’t mean he doesn’t do something every day.  HE DOES!  I just don’t spend my time writing about it.  I would much rather be doing recipe updates or craft projects, etc.

I need to be careful with what I reveal here because he reads all of this too.  He even placed a ping-back inside my website that updates him every time I publish something.  He also gets an alert whenever I tag something in my blog posts.  I’ve also recently discovered a lot of files that he had placed into quarantine so as not to be scanned.  That’s one place that he hides.  I am recording them, and then deleting the files in those boxes.  How am I recording them?  I bought a new camera and I am photographing them and keeping them on the camera.  If I download them or save any information on my computers then Paul has access to all of that info. 

My New Vintage Camera

I took my computers somewhere that I cannot say here and had someone to take a look at them.  I was told that Paul has a lock on me.  What that means is that when I access any account I have online, whether it be my email, my website, Ebay, banking…. he then gets an alert that I just logged in.  The alert tells him the time I logged in, the account in which I just logged in, the location, and the IP address.  If he knows the IP address then he can get into that computer no matter who’s it may be.  Which is why I never use other people’s computers.  Oh, I could get onto your computer and search through Google or read news and he won’t know where I am, but if I logged into any account of mine on your computer then he would know and then he could get into your computer. 

Paul is in my computer’s and has been for years.  He loves to let me know that. 


He will also get into my photos.  For example, about a year and a half ago I noticed a photo of Mel Gibson and Danny Glover in one of my folders.  It was entitled, Sabina and Me.  Sabina is my brother Johnny’s partner.  There is also a photo that he turned cartoony and placed it into a folder of a blog post he knew I was working on.  Here is that photo:


I’ve also recently discovered that Paul has been using the microphones on our devices to listen in.  Not just cell phones, but our computers.  I have turned the microphone off many times and he just keeps turning it back on.  So my solution to that is to monitor it, and I have taped lots of cotton over my laptop speakers hoping to muffle things if he does turn the microphone back on and I’m not aware of it.  I have two laptops here with me.  This one, and a newer one.  I’ve got that one all taped up as well.  However, the last time I turned it on the computer spoke to me and asked me what I wanted?  I then turned it off and haven’t turned it back on since.

As of about a week ago he has tampered with my ability to upload and resize photos for me to insert into blog posts on my website.  I have found a way around that, but I’ve added an additional 6 steps to the already 4 steps it took before.  So, I go through about 10 steps now to post one photo on my site.  That slows things down.

I did order an audit of my website and they submitted their report which I forwarded to the new people that I have hired to work on my website.  They haven’t started yet but they should soon.  They are costing me $29.00 an hour and seeing as how Paul has done so much damage to my site as it is it will be expensive to repair. 

I am also going to have them to disable comments to my site.  I never get any sincere comments, only Spam.  I also think that is how Paul plants malware on my site.  Comments will come in with links that have malware.  He sends them, then comes into my site and clicks on the malware, that releases it into my site.  When I see them all come in I immediately block them from my site and delete everything.  I don’t even read any of the stuff. 


Gordon is overseas and although I cannot say when he will be back, it will be later on in the year.  We do talk every day on the phone though.  One day I needed him to log into the website to try and fix something for me but because I change the password often I had to give it to him over the phone.  Within 5 minutes of my doing that someone had logged into my site and locked me out!  So yes, we have someone listening to our conversations that knew exactly what that password went to.  Hmmm……

Deleting Email:

You know how we delete email every day from our account so as not to clog it up, or because we may not want that snoop that get’s into our email from reading something personal?  Well, the people that I took my computer to that I cannot tell you about at this time guided me to another mirrored email account of mine that had every email going back several years.  Meaning that I can delete all I want but it is being collected somewhere else and read.  My website email now is to cryptic and old, thank’s to Paul, that it’s like going from having a Bluray player to a VHS tape.  It’s so cryptic that I have to click on a link to read the content.  It doesn’t just open up for me to read. 


Might I suggest…..  Julie’s Law

I have been the victim of cyber-stalking by a very sophisticated stalker since the very beginning.  Eventually laws will catch up to protect people like me and imprison people like Paul.  All I am saying is that perhaps all that I have gone through and will continue to go through will someday pave the way that will help other people and prevent them from going through all of this.  If I know that it will do some good in the end then all that I have gone through will be worth it.



I do believe in Karma.  Good Karma and Bad Karma. 

To me Karma is something that we do to ourselves without even knowing it.  If we keep on doing that thing that we aren’t supposed to do then it will eventually catch up to us.  For example, a professional shoplifter may get away with shoplifting every day for 5 years but eventually if he/she keeps doing it they will get caught.  Either technology will catch up to them, someone will see them them, or take some cell phone selfie and accidentally catch them that way. 

When you look at history every great figure was brought down by arrogance.  Paul cannot just simply be a voyeur on my website or my computer.  He has to tamper with something because he wants me to know that he is here.  His vanity will bring him down.  His vanity has already caught up to him several times which is why I have so much evidence against him.  Paul Gray will never leave me alone.  He can’t.  I mean too much to him.  And because he cannot severe those ties with me on his own the only options left are that the law will bring him down, or life will.  Either way, he’s done!  🙂


P.S.  If I need to write something that I don’t want Paul to read I cannot write it on my computer as he has access to all of that.  I either have to write it all down by old fashioned pen and paper, or I have to type it into an old fashioned typewriter.  Then I can mail it through the United States Post Office where it can be read without Paul Gray knowing about it.  🙂

I feel like Angela Lansbury in Murder She Wrote.  🙂


April 10, 2019

Brodie and Mackenzie

My Son’s Girlfriend is an Empath

From the moment that I met Mackenzie I knew she was an Empath but I also knew that she didn’t know what she was.  I remember back in mid December when Brodie first met her that he was very excited about this new girl he met.  He kept wanting to bring her here but I kept telling him to let me get the place ready before he invites her over.  All that I knew was what he told me about her.  I really didn’t read anything into it other than the fact that Brodie was very excited about her.  So, when I got the place a bit in order I told him to invite her over.  WOW!  Was she ever special!  She is like sunshine suddenly entering my home.  I knew instantly from the moment I met her that she was empathic.  I also knew that she didn’t know that she was.  I also knew that Brodie didn’t know that she was.  Brodie tends not to believe in these things even though I prove to him over and over that I can read his mind.  Literally!!  He just chalks it up to luck.  That is really too bad for him seeing as how his mother is an Empath/Psychic, and his new girlfriend is an Empath as well.  Perhaps that was why he was subconsciously attracted to her?  On some level perhaps he does know?

(You know, I never understand  why a person still doubts even when presented over and over again with evidence of proof?) 

Mackenzie is a wonderful girl!  She is very nice, thoughtful, considerate, smart, intelligent, pretty, beautiful, attractive, funny, friendly, kind….  I really could go on and on about her.  It’s funny but the day after I met her I was literally telling everyone that I hope she is my future daughter-in-law.  Unusual, right?  But, I am an Empath and I can read her.  I know she is special, I don’t need to wait around for a year or two like the rest of you.  I know immediately.

Mackenzie comes from a very interesting background.  Her family was on The Mayflower.  Her ancestor is the first birth on The Mayflower.  She and her twin sister Susannah were given the names of their Mayflower ancestors.  Her grandparents owned LIFE Magazine.  There was a huge scandal of the affair that her grandmother had with another man during that time.  That man actually went on to die at The White House during Richard Nixon’s Presidency.  Are you not as glued as I am to all the details?  🙂  I will certainly be writing more about her and her ancestry in the future but for now I just wanted to focus on her.

She and Brodie are the same age.  Mackenzie was born in New York and lived just outside The Bronx.  She wanted to move down here to Florida, so she did.  And after she came down here her twin sister decided that she wanted to move down here too.  Shortly followed by their parents.

Mackenzie is still in school and interestingly enough, works with the elderly.  (If you know anything about Empaths we tend to gravitate toward the elderly, and counseling.)

On my:  On Being an Empath Blog I posted this:

My family members always said, “Julie helps old people.”

My Grandfather Franklin, My Great-Grandmother Honnie, and Me

(That is me, aged 3, helping my Great-Grandmother up the stairs.  How many 3 year old’s that you know do that?  I knew that she needed help so I turned around and helped her.  I read her feelings.)

As far as Mackenzie is concerned I’ve been working with her a bit so that she can understand what she is and how her ability can help her and others.  I wish that I had had someone to spot me many years ago and help me to understand this ability.  It is difficult being an Empath in a non-empathic world.  We will never be able to live up to our potential.  But I would not trade this ability for the world.  I sometimes wonder if I don’t have a brain tumor?  It is said that some psychic’s have been known to have brain tumor’s and that the tumor puts pressure on a part of the brain that is paranormal.  From the time I was a small child I’ve had stabbing pains in my head.  It’s as if someone thrust a knife into my brain!  The pain only last’s about 5 seconds but it is enough to bring me to my knee’s.  The pain is excruciating, but it goes away quickly.  My last episode was 2 weeks ago.  I was in my bedroom when the pain suddenly hit me and I collapsed unto the floor.  The thing is, If I were to discover that I have a brain tumor I don’t think that I would want it removed.  It would be like loosing my eyesight, or my hearing, but on a much higher level.

I do wish that the non-empathic world would recognize our potential.  Place us in airports, concert venue’s, stadium events….  we can spot psychopaths and sociopaths very easily.  I can’t help but wonder if an Empath had been hired to screen the people entering Ariana Grande’s concert in Manchester, England would that bomber been able to succeed?  When a psychopath or a sociopath is getting ready to do whatever terrible thing they are about to do is when their feelings are strongest and we can read them easily.  But, there are plenty of psychopath’s and sociopath’s that don’t commit terrible crimes.  But we can spot them and flag them so that they can be watched and monitored.

But until that time that we are acknowledged, accepted, believed, etc.  we stay secluded.  Pity, because we could really be of some help.



March 31, 2019

Monk and Sugar

The End of an Era


Monk in Hospice

Monk laying at the foot of my computer chair in one of his many dog beds.  It was sort of a running joke the amount of dog beds that we have in our house.  We had a total of 4 dog beds and 3 dog mats scattered throughout our house.  It comes from my laziness.  I refuse to carry one dog bed from room to room so I have a dog bed in every room.  (I do the same thing with my prescription and reading glasses.  There is a pair within arms reach all over this house.  As in about 25-30 pairs.)  🙂

I had to put Sugar down in June 2017 and it was very hard on me as I had to do it myself.  I did take Monk with me so that we could say goodbye to Sugar together.  We brought her body home with us and Gordon dug a hole in our backyard. 

Now, March 2019, Monk has joined her.  But this time Brodie was the one that dug the hole.  Gordon is still overseas.  I told Gordon that when I put Sugar down that it would be the last time I did it alone as it was so traumatic for me.  He promised me that I would never have to do it alone again.  Well, we can’t control fate and it was me that took Monk in to be put down.

When we first adopted Monk many years ago he was previously owned by breeder’s and groomer’s.  Monk was a good looking pug and he produced good looking offspring, but he was a very sad pug.  His life was living in a cage.  And from what we do know, he was passed around quite a bit.  Finally, an organization called Heidi’s Legacy got him and placed him up for adoption.  When Gordon and I decided to adopt I was looking at agency’s online and I came across this huge selection of animals and their “mug shots.” I then saw this pug named Monk.  Monk!  (I was a huge fan of the t.v. show Monk, starring Tony Shalub.  As a matter of fact I have it on right now in DVD form, season 6, I believe, playing in the background.)  🙂

The name may have caught my attention but the worried expression on his face is what drew me in.  So, I contacted the agency and we started an adoption application and interview.  I was given the application and it asked me to write about everything that I knew about pugs.  I don’t think they meant for me to really list everything I knew about pugs because I not only filled up the small space on the form, but I added an additional notebook sized paper that I stapled to the form. 

Note to anyone within earshot:  Don’t ask me to list everything I know about something because I will list everything I know about it.

When we went to pick Monk up he was a bit worried so I held him in my lap in the car ride home.  I also sat with him for the first 3 days as he was very sad and didn’t know what was happening.  He would walk over to our sliding glass doors and howl very loudly.  He was lost and he was howling hoping that another friend of his would answer.  But none never did. 

Monk and I bonded and he was very attached to me until he died.  He always wanted to be with me.  Oh, he did love Gordon and Veronica and Brodie.  He also loved to snuggle with all of them, including Brodie’s friends, but Monk had a very special attachment to me.  I too have never loved a dog as much as I do Monk.


Monk’s Grave in our Pet Cemetery

So far we have 2 dogs and 3 fish in our pet cemetery.


Monk on our Bed

When I took Sugar to be put down she went very peacefully, but Monk didn’t, which is why I am so very sad about his passing because he did suffer a bit.  The last two days of Monk’s life I was taking care of him as if he were a baby.  He could no longer walk so I had him to lay on urine pads in his dog beds.  I would change his position about 6 times a day so that he was comfortable.  I had to clean him up with damp cloths and hand feed him.  I did place his food bowl underneath his head and he did eat one night, but the following day he just didn’t want any of that hard dog food. 


Eggs and Ice Cream

Monk on his Heating pad

I knew that I would be putting him down the following day so I gave him a nice send off where food was concerned.  He loved eggs and ice cream!  So that is what I gave him.  I had to hand feed him but he ate every bit of it!  I even fed him the same thing the day he died. 

When I took him in to our veterinarian’s office to be put down I already knew what to expect from Sugar’s passing.  They put us in a dark room, they then took Monk away to have an I.V. inserted into him, then they are supposed to bring him back and when I am ready they then inject him.  However, I noticed that they were gone a long time when they took Monk away from me.  I was starting to get worried.  I then heard the loudest YELP, TWICE!  I knew it was Monk!  Why is Monk yelping and what is taking them so long to bring him back to me?  I then went looking for him.  It was at the end of the day and they were finished with patients.  It was just a few employees left and me and Monk, and a few pets they were keeping in cages for whatever reason.

I came across one of the employees and I asked her if that was Monk that yelped?  She lied to me and said that she didn’t think so.  I didn’t appreciate that.  I then kept walking and saw Monk spread out on a table with two employees around him trying to insert the I.V..  They told me that his vein’s are just too small and that they were having a hard time finding his vein’s. 

They had a muzzle on Monk!!!

I was just trying to take it all in.  I was having a hard time being there on my own to put down the one dog that I have been closest to in my entire life.  He had been yelping in pain which is why I went looking for him at the vet’s.  When I see him he looks paralyzed laying on a cold steel table and has a muzzle on with two “nurses” trying to insert that needle into his leg.  Monk hasn’t moved in two days.  I seriously doubt he had the strength to snap at anyone.  He had never hurt us the entire time we knew him.  That muzzle was overkill.  A 17 year old pug is not threat to anyone!  Just a bunch of scaredy cat nurses.

I noticed that his head was laying on cold steel so I cradled his sweet face in my hand.  I was crying so hard that I had to keep wiping away the tears just to see.  I was crying hysterically and Monk just kept looking at my face.  That is when I noticed that he had tears coming out of his eyes.  TEARS!  The thing is, Dogs don’t cry.  Yet, I saw tears coming out of his eyes.  He wasn’t looking at the light, he was facing away from it looking at my face. My face was the last thing that Monk saw before he died.  As far as the tears are concerned?  Who is to say that isn’t evolution?  If an octopus can walk out of the ocean and onto dry land then why can’t a dog develop the capacity to cry?

I don’t know if I will be going back to Noah’s Ark Animal Hospital with the next dogs that we adopt.  Other than the experience with Monk’s passing we had been very happy with them but I just don’t know now.  Monk deserved better.  Sugar’s passing was painless and peaceful.  But Monk suffered.  I will never forget about that.

I will miss you forever Monk,

Peace Out,



March 10, 2019

Veneer’s, and What’s Up


Although I need to write about this on my Nifty 50’s Blog Post, I did get veneer’s on my upper teeth.  The procedure started back in October 2018, and I’m still going to the dentist having more improvements done.  When it’s all over with for GOOD! then I’ll tell you if it was worth it.  But, I did just want some kind of “boost” to my appearance for my late 50’s.  I didn’t want any kind of face lift surgery.  I just don’t do those kinds of things.  Not to diss those that do…..  If that is what you want then more power to you.  But I just wanted to do something for me and seeing as how I do love to smile I wanted my smile to look better.  And I do kind of like my miniature vampire teeth.  🙂

I will be writing more about my “ordeal” with all the crap that I’ve had to put up with in getting these veneer’s from my dentist.  But I am still dealing with the work, so until it is all over with then I will wait to get into all the details in the future.

Now, as to what I have been up to…… 

Since the wedding, Veronica and Brian’s on January 19th. and since my Bronchitis, literally the day after the wedding and the 2 weeks that proceeded it, and since Gordon has left to go back overseas…… I have just been a bit preoccupied.  And for those that follow me on Twitter and are wondering where I have been and why I’m not Tweeting?  I just haven’t felt like it.  I just haven’t felt like connecting to other people and interacting.  Nothing serious.  I just have wanted to do other things and tackle other things.  I also think that everything runs it’s course and I’m not so into social media right now.  Not to say that next week I may not be Tweeting like gangbusters, but for right now I just don’t feel like it.  If I lose followers, and I’m sure that I will, then so be it.  Social media is almost like a job.  In order to be relevant you literally have to live and breath it all in every single day.  I am just tired of devoting all that amount of time for a few impressions, likes, retweets, comments, reply’s, etc,……

I have however, met some lovely people through Twitter that have brought some insight into my life.  As well as some support and encouragement.  And to those people I am so grateful that I have met them, and have known them.  They have made me smile, laugh, they have inspired me, they have encouraged me, and they have just checked in on me occasionally just to make sure that I am o.k.  They have wished me Happy Birthday, Happy Mother’s Day, Merry Christmas, Happy Thanksgiving, Happy New Year…..

They are from many countries…….  Germany, Ireland, England, Spain, America, Canada……

I am so grateful that they considered me worthy of their attention.

But as for me, right now, I just want to work on my website.  Catch up on a few blog posts that I have neglected for awhile now.  I also want to get a bit organized at home.  Also spring is coming and I want to be ready for it.  Investing in our property and creating lovely areas as to enjoy it all.

So, don’t worry, we are doing fine. 


Sadly, I also find that I am immersing myself into trivial tabloids like The Daily Mail on a regular basis.  I originally started doing that because the papers in the U.K. had more information about what is going on here in America than our own news agencies tell us.  Example:  our news may say that there are 2 deaths in the latest shooting whereas I’ll read the correct number in The Daily Mail which will say 17 deaths.  Oh, our news will eventually give us the correct number hours later.  I also think that I go there because when things get serious in life I tend to gravitate toward the trivial.  Shallow times and shallow people thrive in a shallow society.  BUT, shallowness is usually popular when everyone is doing well and shallow values rule the day.

Shallow times means that everyone is o.k. and has nothing better to do than to gossip and cause trouble for others. 

A.K.A.  The Good Old Days of the Clinton’s when our nation was obsessed with Bill Clinton’s sex life.

So, here is to the good old shallow days!

Let’s just enjoy the time we have and hope for a better tomorrow.



BUT!  I will say this.  When Donald Trump became President I kept seeing and hearing this in my head…..

Gone With The Wind

“We are going to woah, we are going to woah.”

I even Tweeted about it at the time.  Now, experts are saying that we just may be entering into a Civil War if there isn’t a smooth and peaceful transition in 2020 if Trump looses the election.  Be ready for that.  I am an Empath.  I picked up on this in 2004 when G.W. Bush was “re-elected” President.  I went into my bathroom, took a long shower and cried my eyes out because I knew bad things would come of it.  I warned about this in 2008 as well.

We’re going to woah, We’re going to woah….

I hope the Hell NOT!!! 

But signs point to it if there isn’t a smooth transition in 2020.


February 13, 2019

Just when you thought that I wasn’t going to say anything else about my birthday……….

…….MY New Year’s Day!

Last night I woke up and looked at the clock and it was 6 minutes until midnight.  I was so excited!  I was going to be awake and actually see February 13th. happen.  I didn’t take my eyes off the clock.  I was thrilled when I saw 12:00 a.m. flash on the clock.  I wished myself a happy birthday and as I lay there ready to fall back to sleep I suddenly heard a rumbling sound outside.  It started out low and then it started to grow.  (I stole that line from How the Grinch Stole Christmas, but it did apply here.)  It was thunder.  I adore thunder!  It started to get louder.  Then by 12:30 here comes the rain.  It fell hard too!  A storm!  I love storms!  I had this huge smile on my face that I just couldn’t erase.  The thunder and rain made me so drowsy that I fell back to sleep and didn’t wake up until 9:00 a.m. this morning.  It was one of the best night sleep’s that I’ve had in awhile.

When I woke up it was raining outside.  It’s actually been raining all day.  It’s also been dark and cool as well.  To many of you that may not seem like a great day but these kinds of day’s are my most favorite.  I love nothing better than a thunder storm with lots of rain and loud thunder and lightening that last’s all day long.  I always have.  I guess I’m just weird that way. 

My day has been to most people I imagine, the most boring day imaginable.  But to me, It’s been wonderful!  I did hear from a few people today with birthday greetings for me via the telephone, e-mail, Twitter, and even some old fashioned birthday cards through the snail mail. I guess the point that I am trying to make here is that life is how you see it.  Just because most people prefer a sunny day doesn’t mean that you have to.  Oh, don’t get me wrong I adore sunny day’s!  But, my most favorite day in the world is a stormy one, and that’s what I got.  🙂

My son Brodie and his girlfriend McKenzie gave me a bottle of wine and a plant, which I love!  Before Gordon left for overseas he bought me the chair that I am sitting on in the photo above.  We picked it out together.  My daughter Veronica called today and asked if she and Brain could come over today and give me my birthday gift?  I told her not to worry about it as I have been wearing my new pajamas all day and that I am planning on a very easy evening of my Ranch Chicken Taco’s with some Sangria and that I will be going to bed early.  I knew that it was probably a relief to her and Brain that they didn’t have to rush over here for me as they tend to value their weeknight’s because they work so hard.  I understand that so I wasn’t about to impose on them.  We’ll see each other over the weekend, I’m sure.

So, just enjoy your own special day.  For some reason I am particularly happy about turning 58.  I think because it’s an even number.  (I’m also weird that way as well.)  Enjoy the fact that you are alive and well.  Enjoy the fact that you do have people that you care about still in your  life.  Whether your day is rainy or sunny be sure to appreciate it.  Life is all in your head, and how you see it.  Your sub-conscious brain doesn’t know that what you tell it isn’t true. So, in other words tell it that you plan on enjoying your special day whether anyone acknowledges it or not.  It only matters how you see life, and not how someone else see’s it and then tells you how they expect you to see it.  Even if it’s 1000 people telling you something different.  Ignore them.

Happy Birthday to All February 13 er’s! 



My Early Birthday with Gordon

Gordon and I in my car running errands about a week before he left for overseas.

I LOVE my Birthday’s!!!

I will be 58 on the 13th. of February.  But Gordon gave me a birthday before he left.

My Mulan Cake

My Birthday Chair

Monk will be 17 on March 3rd.

My Birthday Chair in the Back


I have always loved my birthday’s.  I never considered how old that I was turning.  I always viewed them as just being my special day.  I mean, I realized the number that I was turning, but I never saw it as being “old”.  I just saw it as being “me.”

Did you know that most elderly die around their birthday’s?  To me, I believe that to most people a birthday is a milestone that they take and judge against their goal’s that they never actually achieved in life, so they tend to feel like failure’s that they never measured up to some yardstick they created for themselves, or that was created for them by other’s.  I also think there is a sadness that the aged have as they see their family members pass on and they fear being alone.

I don’t look at life that way.  I suppose that comes from not being very ambitious?  Which I think is a good thing in this instance.  To me life was always how I wanted to see it and not how other people told me to see it.  Which is why I think I am a bit happier than a lot of other people. (And by “happier” I mean content.  Happiness isn’t some perpetual state.)  I have also always been very comfortable with myself and actually enjoy my “alone” time.  Not that I am looking forward to having family members pass on, but to me that’s just how life works down here and I accept it.

I will be spending my actual birthday alone but I am planning on making it nice.  I am planning on cooking something special, buying some sort of flowers and even some sort of dessert just for me.  I see no reason why I should be sad because it will be my special day.  And I am planning on enjoying all my birthday’s until I don’t have anymore of them.  I will be 58.  Let’s face it, it’s all down here from here.  But I might as well enjoy that downhill thrill ride while I can.  🙂



(Gordon gave me an early birthday.)

February 2019

My Mulan Cake

(So why a Mulan cake?  It is an Asian roll cake with a Strawberry Mouse treat.  The figurines are mine because I adore Mulan and the Asian cultures.)

This month, February 13, I turn 58.  58!  Normally I would say to you that I don’t feel my age and that I find it hard to believe that I am turning 58.  However, I have had bronchitis since January 20, and I have been feeling very weak and fragile.  I feel as if I were to fall down that I would then break into a million pieces.  I haven’t felt this bad since the early 1990’s when I got the flu and I was sick for 2 weeks.  I very rarely get sick.  When I went to the doctor I was told that the CDC (Center for Disease Control) was warning about this bronchitis that is going around.  It hit me while at our party here at our house, the day after our daughter’s wedding, when we had a house full of out-of-towner’s here for the wedding.

We wanted to take advantage of the fact that we had all these out of town guests and have them over to our house for a big party.  Normally Gordon and I are the “do it yourself’ couple but this time we knew to cater as we would just be too busy.  Gordon had spent the last 6 months overseas and he wanted to share this great food that he had been eating over there, with us here.  So, we sought out a caterer that specialized in this type of food.  We found a great one!

But first, we are sprucing up our backyard by adding some new plantings.

Here Gordon and I are out shopping.

Just Trying to get Everything Home

(I still have my driftwood to hold open my car’s trunk.)

All the nice new herbs and plants……..

Gordon also did quite a bit of pressure washing and bleaching to get our backyard back to looking good.  You can see some of the “green” on the foo dog statue in back of Monk.


Here we are at Al Madina ordering the catering for our party.

The store owner’s wife served us excellent Turkish Coffee, and me some great Tea.

The food we sampled for our catered party was excellent!  Now we just need to get through the Rehearsal, the Rehearsal Dinner, the Wedding, and the Wedding Reception………


Click Here for:  Mother of the Bride

If you are interested in the wedding then click on the link above.  I am particularly proud of the write up that I did.

Here Gordon and I are at the wedding, outside the church.  And below waiting to get into the reception room.


Veronica and Brian had a lovely wedding.  I was so proud of her that she planned most of it herself.  Veronica always had good taste.  The foods they chose were also so delicious.

May the Force be With You……Always…..

(I believe I took over 500 photos with my new camera.  The day was perfect!  Gordon and I were so proud of our little girl and her new husband, our son-in-law.  That sounds pretty cool.  We have a son-in-law.  🙂


But, before the wedding there was the Rehearsal, and the Rehearsal Dinner.

Gordon and Julie at the Rehearsal…….

…..and the Rehearsal Dinner at Grillsmith.

(If you would like to see photos then just click on the Mother of the Bride post.)


(Brodie, Julie and Gordon)

Our Party

Gordon and I don’t entertain that much but when we have family and friends down here in Florida then we do like to take advantage of that and have them over to our house for something nice.  So, we asked everyone in advance that they come to our house the day after Veronica and Brian’s wedding for some good food and gifts from abroad.  Gordon and I had gone over some gift ideas that I wanted him to buy while he was overseas, and mail to me here at home, in order to pass them out to all of our guests at our party.

Setting Up for our Party

THE Blue Tarp

Although the day of the wedding called for beautiful warm weather and clear sky’s, the day after the wedding originally called for 100% chance of rain and cold weather!!!

Gordon and I decided to place a blue tarp over our lanai extension in order to protect it from the rain.  We also set up every outdoor umbrella that we had and even our outdoor canopy in order to protect all of our outdoor things from getting wet for our party.  Especially the grill.  We knew we would be grilling Chicken Shwarma.

Luckily, it went from 100% chance of rain on the 20th. to 5% chance of rain.  Although, it did rain the night before, which was good that we did cover the lanai up so that nothing got wet on the following day, our party, everything was nice and dry on our big day.

Gordon, Brodie and McKenzie picked up our food from Al Madina for our party.  OMG!  The food was soo good!

Here you can see everyone helping themselves.

The Baskets Gordon sent from Abroad.

He also must have sent me about 50 scarves!  I decided to just drape them everywhere to use as tablecloths. 

I think we started out in short sleeves but as the day progressed and it got colder and colder, we ended up wearing jackets and sweaters.

Jeff and Gordon

Gordon’s Aunt Susy can really pack away that food!  But she works it off.  She is very athletic, always has been, and is still very active.  She currently takes karate and boxing lessons.  She has Parkinson’s and both of those exercises are supposed to help with that.


The food was so good that people kept coming back for seconds and even thirds.


Arabic Salad

Gordon’s Chicken Shwarma

(Gordon also mailed over to me so many spices that he bought over there. 

Now that everyone has eaten the chicken shwarma they all want spices!)

Gordon’s Palmier’s

This was my request.  I wanted Gordon to make these because I wanted something light and savory that I believe would compliment our meal.


Falafal’s with all the Trimmings

(Hummus in the background)

I think that whenever you will be serving food to people that are not too familiar with it, especially such spicy food as this, I think it’s important to have some of the food to be a bit plain.  And by “plain” I mean just not as spicy.  Most people do like Falafal’s.  Also even just some hummus on plain pita bread can be a safe option for those picky eaters, especially children.

The Rice was Delicious!

And now for the main event………The Lamb!

Look at all the garlic cloves!  Everyone loved this lamb! 

But you can see it start to congeal, the colder the weather got outside.


Veronica and Brian (The Newlyweds)

Veronica looking skeptical.  (She always looks skeptical.)  🙂

We were happy that they were able to drop by for a little while.  They were going to leave on their Honeymoon Cruise the following day but at about 1:30 a.m. a tornado blew through their next door neighbor’s roof ripping it off and causing damage to Veronica and Brian’s fence.  So, they had to deal with that before they left.  Their next door neighbor’s were renting and all of their stuff got wet and was ruined.  We do live in what is called “Florida’s Tornado Alley.”

I think it’s about time for dessert now.



This is delicious!  It has their particular cheese in it that from what I understand you have to prepare the cheese for the recipe before you can make this dessert.  I understand the cheese is very salty so you have to soak it?  I think?  It has a noodle like pastry and it is topped with pistachio’s.  Next to the dessert you see this sugary syrup that you drizzle on top of it.  This was a huge hit with everyone as no one had ever eaten anything like it before.  It was also a bit expensive.  The portion you see above was $25.00.  Well worth it though!

These are the pastries that Gordon brought home with him on the airplane.  Everyone dug into these as well.

Cousins, Kelcy and Veronica

(Veronica showing us photos on her phone of the tornado damage to their neighbor’s roof and Veronica and Brian’s fence.)


Looks like it’s time for Corn Hole!!!!!

Brodie and McKenzie playing Kelcy and Heather

(I guess we are officially senior’s in Florida when we own our own Corn Hole game.)  🙂


Champaign and Sparkling Soda on Ice


Ready to Toast the Newleyweds


To Veronica and Brian………..


Jeff Catching his Uber


Now it’s time for the Gifts

  Everyone was enjoying everything from the food, to the atmosphere, to the gifts…….

Looks like Gordon is being Ali Klaus.  🙂

I had ordered a lovely piece of furniture for outside that never arrived in time for our party.  I originally had wanted to set all the gifts out on the cabinet, and even hanging all around it while some items were suspended above it, in order for it to look like an Arabic souvenir stand.  Gordon sent over scarves for everyone, lots of change purses, soaps, backpacks, cookbooks, ceramic bowls…….

But instead, in order to make it easy on me because I was sick, I told him to just leave everything inside the trunk and they can just go through it as if they discovered treasure in the dessert.


We had a great party even though I was sick and didn’t feel too good.  I also didn’t eat much of all that delicious food that day.  I ended up getting worse that night.  Luckily I had Gordon here to take care of me and to take care of all of the leftover food.  I pretty much did nothing for about a week but lay in the Lazy Boy watching t.v. and video’s.  I think my only errand that week was to the doctor. 

Sadly we also had to cancel our reservation at Casa Monica in St. Augustine, Florida.  A haunted hotel.  We were set to go for about 6 days so that we could get away together after all the hustle and bustle of wedding activities.  But sadly, I was just too sick to go.  But when we saw how much money we would be loosing by not going we went ahead and sent Brodie and McKenzie in our stead.  That way someone got to enjoy it.  🙂

It did end up being very cold, wet, and rainy for them.  McKenzie said that she was having to blow dry their shoes 3 times a day it was so wet.  I am sorry to hear that their stay was not as nice as it should have been, but I am happy for us that I don’t think we really missed out on very much by not going.  However, we will get there sometime this year.  I am determined to enjoy my haunted vacation.  🙂


At this writing Gordon was home for 3 weeks but he has since flown back overseas.  Hence, why my early birthday from above.  🙂

Thus is the life of a contractor……..  I would tell you the next time he’ll be home but I’m not allowed to.  🙂

And anyway, I am slated to go and visit him sometime this year that I cannot say…….  🙂

Happy 2019!  I hope it will be a good one for all of us!


(Why does Brodie look like he’s cringing while kissing me?)